I know I haven't updated in a long while, but I feel so... stuck is maybe the best word. Embarrassed at myself. I'm not really depressed, I'm mostly quite fine just as long as I manage as much as possible to block out the knowledge that what I really should be doing is look for a new job. (Or as long as I'm not having dental hygiene, but that's an ( Read more... )

Meh. I was going to take tomorrow, Fri and next Tue. off and drive to Salzburg this evening, but the weather forecast for the weekend is so thoroughly unappealing (persistent rain, possibly snow, cold) that I decided to postpone the trip until the May 1st weekend, because driving 600 km only to sit at home and read a book seems a rather pointless ( Read more... )

Prompted by green-maia's posts about MD and religion, and my own comments there.

My reaction to Immortal Sins in comparison to green_maia's, as well as other people's, made me remember a blog entry by Ricardo Pinto, where he talks about the Catholic themes he noticed in his writing despite being an atheist, and how differently Portuguese readers and readers from ( Read more... )

I know I've been kind of absent lately, but sometimes words feel so pointless and inadequate. Or maybe it's I who feels pointless and inadequate, and on the whole am happier ignoring myself. Everyone around me is moving on with their lives, careers, family; G. has a job interview in Hamburg and my Russian teacher, as it turns out, will be moving to ( Read more... )

Turbulent week so far. Monday I had a fight with M. over absolutely nothing except all the issues we avoid talking about, that had me violently kicking things and hysterically crying in our kitchen for half an hour. It's weird. Much of the time I'm so unemotional that I think there must be something wrong with me, and then I blow up and lose it ( Read more... )

# Tired, but pleasantly so. Went for a long walk today from Neuwaldegg up the Sophienalpe, after which I temporarily lost my way & sense of direction (Note to self: buy a damn map. It's kind of embarrassing getting lost in the woods practically within the city limits of Vienna), found it again with the help of a woman walking her dog, who asked me ( Read more... )

I should maybe update again? Finally drove to Salzburg last Thursday, via a very scenic route in both senses of the word, following the Danube until Grein, because you can only take the Westautobahn so many times before getting bored out of your mind, and that was already a gorgeous start to this holiday, sun glittering on the water, the vineyard ( Read more... )

Inspired by green_maia, who was wishing more people would post photos of themselves at different ages. I was aiming for one photo per year, but even raiding my parents' albums that didn't quite work out, so there are a couple of missing years, and, to make up for that, and because I couldn't decide which photos to post, a few years with two photos.

( 38 years in photos )

Last part of family Christmas over, done with, and survived.

( personal ramblings )

Updating from Salzburg; I took Fri. off and drove here Thu. evening after work, which was a bit stressful especially as I don't really like driving in the dark, not even on the Autobahn, but totally worth it. The first two days were painfully beautiful, a cloudless blue sky, sunny, warm, snow on the mountains and every shade of brown, gold, yellow ( Read more... )